Please read "Lazy Parenting" before you read this.
The reader I quoted in my "Lazy Parenting" blog responded to my response with the following:
"Thanks, Taylor! I appreciate what you said about being gentle with myself. That's something I have to always work on. And you are right, my toddler cries and it's all good and we begin again. It's OK for her to see mommy make mistakes and say sorry too.
I'm in my 3rd trimester and have been tired and emotional as of late, which she sees, and I'm working on not judging it but just going with it. When I beat the +*#~ out of myself emotionally it's way worse than just feeling the emotion, taking a breath and moving on.
You're so right about the lazy parenting piece. Being a school teacher, I see it all the time. The kids from loving homes who have clear and consistent boundaries thrive versus the kids who do not. My husband is in education too-- he's been a teacher for many years -- and he has many stories that echo this sentiment.
We find we are always trying to maintain the delicate balance between encouraging our child's spirit--being too strict can break a child's spirit--and providing the right amount of redirection and discipline so she has clear and consistent limits in which to thrive. She is an incredibly joyful child with a very strong little spirit. The girl very clearly knows what she wants, which I admire and respect. She's my best teacher, and I can't wait to see what our next baby has to teach us too.
Thank you for being you and always being so honest and real. You've been one of my best teachers.
Have a wonderful day."